Creative Discussions > Fan Fiction & Writing

A Man's Hitmonlee. [WARNING ADULT LANGUAGE]

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Level5Pidgey:
*a Spearow is seen pecking at the ground, when a large foot slowly slides underneath it, and kicks it into the air. A follow up aerial kick from a Hitmonlee sends the Spearow flying horizontally at an alarming speed.

The camera cuts to an odd looking trainer holding his arm out holding a Pokeball. The Spearow slams right into the button on the ball, which starts the capture process.
The trainer, looking pleased, clutches the ball tightly, fighting the struggles of the captures Spearow.*

*The same scene happens with a Pidgey,  and then a Rattata*

"Good work Hitmonlee.. oh... oh! Look! A Dunsparce! On the road to Pallet? How strange..." the odd trainer exclaims.
"Well, time for the combo. Let's get it."

*The Hitmonlee kicks the Dunsparce up into the air, but, as it does the follow up kick, its foot sets aflame - sending the Dunsparce flying at such a ridiculous speed that it is KO'd upon contact with the Pokeball - also sending the trainer staggering backwards from the force.*

"What the fuuuccckk, dude? Too much!"
*Hitmonlee makes sounds of annoyance*
"No, don't give me that, just too much dude, too much. You know, you can pull that on Lance's Dragonite and crap but man, a Dunsparce? Come on..."

"Now what are we going to do with this?" the trainer asks, as he holds up the fainted Dunsparce.
*Hitmonlee shrugs, but starts to get a gleam in its eye - it starts to giggle*
"Oh... hehehehe... I think I know what you're thinking..."

---- Later at the Pokemon Centre ---------------

Trainer: "Look out! Coming through! We have an emergency!"
The trainer runs to the front bench.
Trainer: *crying very unconvincingly* "Please, you've got to help my poor Dunsparce! It... it... just totally fainted!"
Nurse: "Uhhh... shouldn't it be in a Pokeball?"
Trainer: *thinking* "It... it would be except you seee..."
The trainer and Hitmonlee look to each other.
Trainer: "Man it totally jammed. Totally... jammed. Like... you know?"
Nurse: *suspicious* "Okay... then... just give it to me..."
Trainer: "Oh, just wondering, will my Pokemon be totally healed?"
Nurse: *smiling* "Of course! Your Pokemon will be fine in no time!"
Trainer: *walking away* "Damn..."
The Nurse looks puzzled in the background.

*The trainer and his Hitmonlee sit in the waiting room*

Trainer: "So like... you know... that was a pretty powerful kick... you know..."
"Like... Dunsparces aren't that light... you... know... you could try to..."
*Hitmonlee shakes it head in an obvious "No." signal*
"Nah but... man..."
*No.*
"I've always wanted to go to Fuschia and well, Snorl--"
*No.*
"Oh well you don't have to give me that, I'm just saying... you know?"
*Hitmonlee rolls its eyes*
"I'm just saying, like, they're not *that* heavy..."
*Hitmonlee shakes its head, clenching its fists in frustration.*


"Like, PokeFlutes are pretty expensi--"
*Hitmonlee makes argumentative noises*
"No, no way am I getting involved in that."
*Why?*
"No. Hey. You know how I feel about fuucking ghostly Marow-- and.. yeah"
*...*
"Well look, you won't be able to touch it. And like, Raichu definitely won't be able to touch-- and... that thing has Team Rocket written all over it you know?"
*...*
"Nah thats totally their kind of thing. Kidnapping old men and all that."
*...*
"And like, you know, that's the police's work. And you know they don't like vigilantes."
*Oh I'm sure they'd--*
"No, no. Did you hear what happened to that fuucking 10 year old kid? The fuucking death sent--"

The loudspeaker chimes "Dunsparce for Tim and ...Makuhita?"

"-- that's what."

*Hitmonlee glares*
"Hey, no, don't you give me that look! You're a wanted Pokemon in like, 5 fuucking cities, we can't use your real species!"
*Hitmonlee gives a very hushed "Don't go there" action*
"Hey I'm not bringing it up, I'm just saying... but... dude... with a Skitty? Come on..."
*Hitmonlee kicks the trainer in the shins*

*Cut to the emergency room, Dunsparce is still recovering*

"Hey doc, I thought you said it would be A-OK."
"Well, the Dunsparce took quite a beating, it's still a little hurt"
*The doctor turns away to prepare medication, while the trainer's face lights up and the trainer and his Hitmonlee exchange high fives*
"Now, you'll need to administer a couple of potions over the next couple of hours..."
*The trainer quickly captures the Dunsparce, and the duo climb out of the open window*
"So all you need to do is just...."

"Oh what the fuuck?"


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

End of story. I told you it would be crazy.

Alais:
Haha, Pidgey, I love it. None of your normal pokemon sugar-sweetness or bad guys = evil. I normally can't read pokemon fan fiction because it's full of suffocatingly innocent trainers who are all so unforgivably nice. You should keep writing this! I was really disappointed when it ended.

spirit:
Hmmm....I don't know how to respond to this.

I think I saw a spelling error or two, but that doesn't matter.

Ummmm.....Oh, I know what I can say about it

Haha, Pidgey, I love it. None of your normal pokemon sugar-sweetness or bad guys = evil. I normally can't read pokemon fan fiction because it's full of suffocatingly innocent trainers who are all so unforgivably nice. You should keep writing this! I was really disappointed when it ended.

stephenkill2:
bahaha, I want a hitmonlee!  ::)

duotent:
i wanna be hiding in nurse joys office na joke but 9999999/2 stars XXDD P.S. i dont care about the adult language

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